Six months... The longest that I have not written since I started this blog... Wonder if that is a good or bad thing... Before you go off wondering whether I was profoundly busy or travelling or cooking, don't! Cause I was not at all busy, let alone doing all those things... It was probably more like profound laziness. However, a trigger and some vellapan at office has made me finally start one post.
The trigger was a TED talk I recently came across about how to stay passionate by a 71-year-old charming and beautiful woman. She had various ways of explaining the main topic of the talk: meditation, letting go of stuff, love, drama, acceptance of life's situations, erotic fantasies about Antonio Banderas (well, she was 71, so I figure he was the one to fantasise about, in her time...) But then she went on and said something that really got me thinking. She said she has passed the age of retirement, so she has paid her dues in life and now it is her chance - to do what she wants, to stay happy and attain fulfillment. She felt, at this stage in life, she does not really have to care about what people say or think of her - her own happiness is all that matters. (Here it is, if you want to see it)
My only contention with her view is, do we really have to wait till we are retired and free of all responsibilities to have 'our time'? What if I do not reach the age of retirement? (God forbid and touch wood, but still!) Her statement made me wonder: what if I am waiting for a time that will never come in my life? Where then, will my chance to have the time of my life, do what I want to, be happy and attain fulfillment, go, I ask?
In the past year, somehow, I am increasingly drawn towards analysing what I want to do with my life. I am increasingly resenting the fact that I spend most of my time travelling to work and sitting in an office - tasks I am beginning to think are straining my already limited time in this world. Somehow, I feel this is not what I want to do. However, it really is the way of the world, isn't it? What justification could be there to leave a well-paying job in a good company, when you do not have any earth-shattering ambition of doing something spectacular; when there is nothing but a vague feeling at the back of your muddled brain that I PROBABLY want to do something else, but am not exactly sure what that is.
I love this piece written by Zosia Mamet (I seriously didn't know who she was until a friend sent across this article to me). It talks about the pressures the concept of feminism has put on women, when it is actually supposed to do just the opposite. If a woman let's go of a lucrative opportunity just to do something close to her heart, she should be considered no less successful, is her main point. However, the piece didn't appeal to me merely due to the streak of feminism and the whole 'Lean in/Don't Lean in' discussion. What I like is that she stresses on how you need to define what it is that makes you successful (hopefully bringing happiness along with it). It may be having a baby or taking care of your husband or starting a small business... I don't even think this needs to be restricted to a woman by the way - if you are a guy and want to do the same, more power to you! (although for the baby part, you may need some help from your wife :P) And even if you have left a Vice President level job to do so, it does not matter as long as that is what you want to do and makes you happy.
I am starting to believe strongly that being happy, doing the things you love and being with the people who matter the most should be my highest priority, cause who knows what the future has in store for me? However, I feel like I am not being able to take any steps towards it for now. I am still looking for my definition of success and happiness - it seems to be just out of my grasp right now. I need to ponder over what it is that I want to do first... The action and decisions to make it happen will come later.
Hmmm... I should probably start gardening or baking - maybe epiphany will strike then?
The trigger was a TED talk I recently came across about how to stay passionate by a 71-year-old charming and beautiful woman. She had various ways of explaining the main topic of the talk: meditation, letting go of stuff, love, drama, acceptance of life's situations, erotic fantasies about Antonio Banderas (well, she was 71, so I figure he was the one to fantasise about, in her time...) But then she went on and said something that really got me thinking. She said she has passed the age of retirement, so she has paid her dues in life and now it is her chance - to do what she wants, to stay happy and attain fulfillment. She felt, at this stage in life, she does not really have to care about what people say or think of her - her own happiness is all that matters. (Here it is, if you want to see it)
My only contention with her view is, do we really have to wait till we are retired and free of all responsibilities to have 'our time'? What if I do not reach the age of retirement? (God forbid and touch wood, but still!) Her statement made me wonder: what if I am waiting for a time that will never come in my life? Where then, will my chance to have the time of my life, do what I want to, be happy and attain fulfillment, go, I ask?
In the past year, somehow, I am increasingly drawn towards analysing what I want to do with my life. I am increasingly resenting the fact that I spend most of my time travelling to work and sitting in an office - tasks I am beginning to think are straining my already limited time in this world. Somehow, I feel this is not what I want to do. However, it really is the way of the world, isn't it? What justification could be there to leave a well-paying job in a good company, when you do not have any earth-shattering ambition of doing something spectacular; when there is nothing but a vague feeling at the back of your muddled brain that I PROBABLY want to do something else, but am not exactly sure what that is.
I love this piece written by Zosia Mamet (I seriously didn't know who she was until a friend sent across this article to me). It talks about the pressures the concept of feminism has put on women, when it is actually supposed to do just the opposite. If a woman let's go of a lucrative opportunity just to do something close to her heart, she should be considered no less successful, is her main point. However, the piece didn't appeal to me merely due to the streak of feminism and the whole 'Lean in/Don't Lean in' discussion. What I like is that she stresses on how you need to define what it is that makes you successful (hopefully bringing happiness along with it). It may be having a baby or taking care of your husband or starting a small business... I don't even think this needs to be restricted to a woman by the way - if you are a guy and want to do the same, more power to you! (although for the baby part, you may need some help from your wife :P) And even if you have left a Vice President level job to do so, it does not matter as long as that is what you want to do and makes you happy.
I am starting to believe strongly that being happy, doing the things you love and being with the people who matter the most should be my highest priority, cause who knows what the future has in store for me? However, I feel like I am not being able to take any steps towards it for now. I am still looking for my definition of success and happiness - it seems to be just out of my grasp right now. I need to ponder over what it is that I want to do first... The action and decisions to make it happen will come later.
Hmmm... I should probably start gardening or baking - maybe epiphany will strike then?
Bravo! What a way to tell me that you want to laze around the house! True to that gem you coined - 'what is life but a series of Sundays'!
ReplyDeleteI would love for you to find your true calling. You should find happiness in whatever you do and the first step is to have that very realisation.
Let me know when the cake is ready though. ;-)
haha buy me an oven first mister! Then see how I make life a series of Sundays :)
ReplyDeleteDid anyone finally bake the cake?!?
ReplyDelete