The marriage diaries

You know that one event that changes your life for better or for worse? If you can’t guess it from the title itself… Well… Then no points for you.

Marriage can be one of the scariest experiences of a girl’s life. And the reasons for that are not at all in lines with the one that guys have… Loss of freedom… to ogle or party.. without permission. (FYI, My hubby has the permission to ogle at anyone, cause I know at the end of the day he’s coming back to me! But as usual, I digress from the point.)

For girls, the prospect of getting married can get overwhelming. Going into a new home and adjusting with a whole new family can be daunting, to say the least. And in case it is an arranged marriage, her husband is one more person she doesn’t know and has to adjust with! In short, it can be quite a nightmare.

They say girls dream of their marriage day since they are seven or eight years old. I could never relate to that. For one, at eight, I was still learning to comb my hair or cut a simple salad! I had more real life, practical problems to take care of than dreaming of a day I didn’t even understand at that point. I mean have you SEEN the multiplication tables we were given in the second standard?!?

However, when the thought did enter my mind-many, many years after I turned eight-it shook me up real bad. What do you mean I need to leave my home and family and stay with another one?!? Why can’t the boy come live with us?!? Mom had to work really hard to knock the concept into my brain. And when I finally realised that she was actually serious, it left me with an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach. Which never really went away, even when I got older.

The thought of spending the rest of my life with a virtual stranger and his family started giving me nightmares. And the fact that I had to go through the whole arranged marriage rigamarole, that too, in a Gujju setup, didn’t assuage my doubts one bit!

However, on 25th February, 2012, all my fears turned out to be unfounded as I married the love of my life and soulmate. Previously, I used to worry about how I would cope with the adjustment; but looking into Kshitij’s eyes when I married him banished all the fear. Before, I wondered how on earth I was going to manage so much responsibility; but the way he smiled at me while taking the vows reassured me that it was going to be an equal partnership. My major concern was whether my thought process would match with the person I was supposed to spend my life with; Kshitij is like my mirror image: he thinks of the same things even before I can articulate the idea to him.

Even the marriage turned out to be perfect. The day was beautiful; all the guests were well-behaved; the decoration was done well; everything was on time; the food was amazing; my make-up was just right. But above all, it FELT right! It FELT like the union of two lives and families. It FELT like a marriage!

I never thought it would be this perfect. But then I realised, it was not related to the venue or the people or the complications related to hosting such a huge event. All that took care of itself. It was the happiness of knowing that everything was going to be all right. That the change that was happening was going to be a good one. I was going to share my life with someone I loved and trusted immensely, and someone who loved and respected me in return. It was going to be a happy partnership, unlike all the nightmares I had conjured up in so many years! And the realisation took a weight off my shoulders that shouldn’t have been there in the first place.

My marriage was perfect… Because my partner is perfect… And my life from now on is going to be… just perfect!